We got a little serious there.
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I think "fisting" should be called "upper-cunting",
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And we're back.
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Do you guys like impressions?
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(Yeah.)
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"Why?" That was Socrates.
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Older traditional stand-up comics sometimes have problems with me
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Because they think I use music and other stuff
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And they think I'm a gimmick, I'm a hack, you know, I'm a gimmick comic
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And they're such comedy purists, they don't think my comedy can stand on it's own.
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But the truth is, I'm a comedy purist, too.
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So I can do comedy without gimmicks.
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I'll show you that right now.
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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch?
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Names!
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For those listening on the CD, I just gave birth to a dove.
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I love traditional stand-up comedy, don't get me wrong.
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I love it. I'm a huge fan of traditional stand-up comics.
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A lot of them are my heroes.
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And I want to be a traditional stand-up comic
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And I've been working on some traditional stand-up material and
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It's in its infancy so, please, bare with me, go easy
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But this is a bit of my traditional stand-up.
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My wife, right.
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We never have sex. Like, ever. Which is really funny.
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Something else, I never know what she's saying.
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She'll say something and I'll be like, "pft."
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You know, she's constantly emasculating me
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And I'm making her resent herself for getting older,
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So we're looking into a divorce.
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And, you know, something else that's really funny:
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She can't drive. The only thing she can drive is
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"Drive me crazy," and when she back talks, I hit her.
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-----------------
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Traditional Stand-Up
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Bo Burnham |