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THE PROMISE OF AGONY
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(Music: Durkin/Hoglan, Lyrics: Hoglan)
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You tell me what will become of us?
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Are the lines so drawn and the stage so set,
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That as we age what reamins is burdened sufferance?
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My mortality looms in its visage is doom,
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And it's speaking to me alone.
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The years will unfold but what is the use?
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In solitude I'm left to atone.
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The sins of my past are returning to gnaw at my core,
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The scars I have left and those that have been left on me.
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My purpose in life, is it unfair to assume I have one?
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I'm not fooling myself, what now awaits is a nightmarish end.
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What I'm saying, do you understand?
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Do you know what it's like to feel inadequate?
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And the future ahead has no place for you,
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As if you ever thought it did...
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Alone in my shell, if I come out I'll die,
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I don't want to escape though I should.
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No, just leave me alone, *I don't want your help!!*
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Yeah, if you could ease my pain you would... (right!)
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No, you don't even know me!
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And your words of comfort fall upon deaf and frightened ears,
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I lament my bitter fate, lachrymation upon examining my fears.
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I've built a fortress around my soul, impregnable the door,
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I refuse to admit you to my netherworld.
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You're correct, I've absolved my self-control,
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This spiraled course depression has me on.
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(chorus)
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AGONY!
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I'M A STUDY IN DESPAIR, DOMINEERED BY THE PROMISE OF AGONY!
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AND THE HAPPINESS IS BOUND, AND THE HOPELESSNESS IS FOUND.
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I'M IN AGONY!!!!
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CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND, DESPONDENCY COMMANDS MY AGONY!
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and i'm waiting to die alone...
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As I'm drowning in a sea of abused visions and shattered dreams,
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A chilling descent into a phobic hell,
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Insanity's blade performs it's correctional surgery.
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Impending doom in this blackened room, I can give this all away.
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It's all so easy to capitulate, Nothing is making me stay...
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Retreating within and hiding behind my wall.
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Dealing without, there's no escape from this moribund state.
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Awaiting deep sleep, we don't care if I don't wake.
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In darkness' hands though terrified, I feel safe.
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I don't fit into the scheme of things!
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These years as an outcast are quickly wearing thin.
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My carefree days are a thing of the past,
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And I welcome the fact that I'm coming to an end.
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Melancholy, my bride, I devote unto thee,
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My, breath, my mind and my soul.
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As silence washes over me, I've never been so tired, so cold...
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Confusion seizes unto me,
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Manacled and beaten, chained up by it's frozen vice.
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This is killing me, but my mind is set, and I'm too weak to fight.
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Have you any idea what it's like to want to die?
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Then you will know from where I speak.
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This winter in my soul,
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This winter in my soul...
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(chorus)
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AGONY!
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I'M A STUDY IN DESPAIR, DOMINEERED BY THE PROMISE OF AGONY!
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AND THE HAPPINESS IS BOUND, AND THE HOPELESSNESS IS FOUND.
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I'M IN AGONY!!!!
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CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND, DESPONDENCY COMMANDS MY AGONY!
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and i want to be left alone...
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Yet again, I have no answers,
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The confusion of my fate takes it's toll.
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Symbolically speaking, what's another life
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That lists "ending itself" as its one and only goal?
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I've examined my options and I see nothing in my sight,
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Is there an avenue I've yet to explore?
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As of now, I'm decided I have nothing to live for...
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Defeated, alone, yet you laugh at the state I'm in!
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I can't help what I am, but you think this is all in my head.
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I'm not asking for help, but I want you to understand,
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That I'm going away, you guess if I'm coming back.
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You wish I had a will to live?
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This condition I'm in didn't happen overnight.
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I've hated myself for an eternity,
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Now I finally feel that I'm doing something right.
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As darkness descends I behold the Candlemass,
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I seek intimacy with death.
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Again, you're correct, these feelings will pass,
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When my memory is all you have left.
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My life has metamorphosed,
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Into a marriage of the twisted and macabre.
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I'm sitting here now feeling the effects of my words,
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Trying to see a reason why I should go on.
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I have to wonder, do I still believe in God?
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'Cause God no longer believes in me.
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I lay myself down for my final pe |