I was walking barefoot on St. Paul's bridge
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When I saw a man talking to God
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He was round and handsome
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Anachronistically
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A little odd
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I overheard his conversation
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He said, "I can't live in a world devoid of love."
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And the voice, the voice was so familiar
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It was the voice of Peter Ustinov
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"Peter," I whispered from the shadows
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"We've all been damaged by the 20th century
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A man like you can talk to God
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But can you spare a word for me?
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For I have loved you since the time
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I saw you in 'The Mouse that Roared'."
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"That was Peter Sellers, my dear.
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Go away," he implored
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Chorus:
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"See, I used to be Ustinov
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But used to's no good enough for me
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See, I used to be Ustinov
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But used to's not good enough for me."
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The I blurted out "Quo Vadis"
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"Topkapi," ooh yeah "Evil Under The Sun."
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He waved his hand, "It's too late for that.
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As you said, the damage has been done."
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Then he lifted his body up
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To throw himself to a watery grave
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"Peter," I yelled
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"What about 'Billy Budd'
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The innocent no one could save?"
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(Repeat chorus)
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"So tell me what you're dying for
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Have you been so disrespected?"
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He winked at me and said, "'Billy Budd.'
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I wrote, starred, and directed."
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Then he bowed and kissed my hand
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And said, "What was I thinking of?"
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And walked away into the night
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The night I saved Peter Ustinov
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"You used to be Ustinov
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But used to's still good enough for me
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You used to be Ustinov
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But used to's still good enough for me."
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-----------------
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The Night I Saved Peter Ustinov
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Lauren Christy |