Yo this is what happened:
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Yo I woke up late it was like 10 in the mornin'
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I was still half asleep and sleepy eyed, still yawnin'
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I checked my voice mail to see who'd been callin'
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I turned on my computer
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Check my email logged on it
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Junk mail, junk mail dog-gone-it
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Everybody just tryin to sell me they product
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But there was one email that just caught my optic
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It said sucidal, took the mouse and clicked on it
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She said " Dear KJ you don't know who I am,
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You probably don't care cause im just another fan.
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I doubt you ever read this, now but if ya can
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Sometimes I slash my wrists and even cut my hands
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And I feel all alone like nobody understands
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And I'm gonna end it tonight I got the whole thing planned
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Pop pills, leave a note on my night stand
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Signed sincerely, Your Number 1 fan
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[Chorus:]
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Can someone now please help me
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Will someone now just please help me
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Can someone now please help me
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Will someone now just please help me
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[Verse 2:]
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My heart is poundin as I start to type back
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Why do you feel this way do you mind if I ask?
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Whats the source and the cause of the pain that you have
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How did you get this way, is it something from the past
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God cares about you, I hope you understand that
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Please don't end your life, I beg ya please write back
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I finished typin', I sent the email quite fast
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I bowed my head and prayed with all the strength that I had
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She said "Man KJ I didn't even know you would write me.
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Let me explain why noone could ever like me
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It all started when my father used to strike me
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Raped and confused every since 1990
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He's gone now but I can't put it all behind me
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I tried to run away but my pain would always find me
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Is God really the one who can help me (yes He is)
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Signed tonight your Number 1 Fan
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[Chorus]
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[Verse 3:]
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Dear number one fan I gotta lot to tell you
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But with the email there is only so much I can help you
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See I know a Father who could never ever fail you
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He'll give you a love when nobody ever cared to
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I know you might feel like everybody hates you
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And you feel like you got noone you can relate to
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But death feels like the best place to escape to
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But thats a lie that Satan, he just wants to tell you
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I'm sorry that you were abused, your father raped you
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But you gotta get some help cause nobody can make you
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I know its hard to face but God will give you the strength to
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I know you gots a lot of things you gotta work through
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But with this help I know that you can break through
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I seen it myself all the times He came through
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Tell me what you think of what I sent you
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I'll be prayin', Sincerely KJ-52
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[Chorus]
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[Verse 4:]
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Yo, I'd be pretending if I said this story had a happy endin
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But after that night I never heard from her again
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That night I tossed and turned lyin on my bed en
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Cryin and prayin with these thoughts runnin through my head en
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Did she do it, take her life, or wind up dead en
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Or did she not choose it, just listened to what I said en
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Maybe she never got the last one I was sendin
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Was it my fault was it something I shoulda mentioned
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Every mornin I would just check my email
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Checkin for any detail, hopin an prayin that shes well
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My emails came back sayin that they'd failed
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No such address for Number1Fan@hotmail
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Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months en
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Time would pass and I just heard nuthin
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No letter no email no not even just somethin
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What happened to my Number 1 fan I'm still wonderin
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[Chorus]
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-----------------
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#1 Fan
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KJ-52 |