(spoken)
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Jesus.... the missing years
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It was raining. It was cold
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West Bethlehem was no place for a twelve year old
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So he packed his bags and he headed out
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To find out what the world's about
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He went to France. He went to Spain
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He found love. He found pain.
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He found stores so he started to shop
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But he had no money so he got in trouble with a cop
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Kids in trouble with the cops
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From Israel didn't have no home
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So he cut his hair and moved to Rome
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It was there he met his Irish bride
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And they rented a flat on the lower east side of Rome...
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Italy that is
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Music publishers, book binders, Bible belters, Money Changers,
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Spoon Benders and lots of pretty Italian chicks.
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Chorus:
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Charley bought some popcorn
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Billy bought a car
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Someone almost bought the farm
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But they didn't go that far
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Things shut down at midnight
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At least around here they do
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Cause we all reside down the block
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Inside at ....23 Skidoo.
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Wine was flowing so were beers
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So Jesus found his missing years
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So He went to a dance and said "This don't move me"
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He hiked up his pants and he went to a movie
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On his thirteenth birthday he saw "Rebel without a Cause"
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He went straight on home and invented Santa Claus
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Who gave him a gift and he responded in kind
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He gave the gift of love and went out of his mind
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You see him and the wife wasn't getting along
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So he took out his guitar and he wrote a song
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Called "The Dove of Love Fell Off the Perch"
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But he couldn't get divorced in the Catholic Church
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At least not back then anyhow
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Jesus was a good guy he didn't need this shit
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So he took a pill with a bag of peanuts and
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A Coca-Cola and he swallowed it.
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He discovered the Beatles
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And he recorded with the Stones
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Once He even opened up a three-way package
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In Southern California for old George Jones
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Repeat Chorus:
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The years went by like sweet little days
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With babies crying pork chops and beaujolais
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When he woke up he was seventeen
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The world was angry. The world was mean.
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Why the man down the street and the kid on the stoop
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All agreed that life stank. All the world smelled like poop
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Baby poop that is ..the worst kind
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So he grew his hair long and thew away his comb
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And headed back to Jerusalem to find Mom, Dad and home
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But when he got there the cupboard was bare
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Except for an old black man with a fishing rod
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He said "Whatcha gonna be when you grow up?"
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Jesus said "God"
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Oh my God, what have I gotten myself into?
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I'm a human corkscrew and all my wine is blood
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They're gonna kill me Mama. They don't like me Bud.
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So Jesus went to Heaven and he went there awful quick
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All them people killed him and he wasn't even sick
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So come and gather around me my contemporary peers
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And I'll tell you all the story of
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Jesus...The Missing Years
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Repeat Chorus:
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We all reside down the block
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Inside at ....23 Skidoo.
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Jesus The Missing Years
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John Prine |