(Maitland)
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Hey hey, happy man, smiling as he leaves the book store
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Carrying his carrier bags all bulging wide
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Such a lucky man, such a lot to line your shelves with
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Starts to hurry so that he can get
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Inside
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Each book it overflows with violent murder
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That he can read about in bed when he gets home
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It chills him to the bone
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chorus
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'cos he loves Jeffrey Dahmer
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And he loves the son of Sam
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And he loves reciting segments
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From 'The Silence Of The Lambs'
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And he worships Charlie Manson
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Wishes he was Eddie Gein
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He's a member of the fan club
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For the criminally insane
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Hey hey, smiling man, smiling, leaves the local art house -
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Just seen 'Henry' for the thousandth time
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Don't walk - he skips along, calls in at the old newsagent
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To see if his magazine's come in on time
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It has a label screaming: ADULTS ONLY
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And lovingly details all the latest gruesome crimes
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He laps up every line
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chorus
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Hey hey, happy man, smiling while his aunt & uncle have
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Fun force-feeding him with tea and cakes
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Glibly sipping sits, mind-undressing antique figures
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Briskly stiffens when he hears his aunt y say:
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"well, ain't that awful about that girl being murdered"
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His uncle nods and bellows: "string the bastards up !!"
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Our man just grips his cup
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chorus
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Fan Club
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Picture House |